Poem by Maya Angelou

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...

enough money within her control to move out
and rent a place of her own,
even if she never wants to or needs to...
something perfect to wear if the employer,
or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..

a youth she's content to leave behind....
a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to
retelling it in her old age....
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...
one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .......

a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...
eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems,
and a recipe for a meal,
that will make her guests feel honored...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..

a feeling of control over her destiny...
how to fall in love without losing herself..


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to quit a job,
break up with a lover,
and confront a friend without;
ruining the friendship....


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW....

when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

that she can't change the length of her calves,
the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..
that her childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

what she would and wouldn't do for love or more..
how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. .

whom she can trust,
whom she can't,
and why she shouldn't take it personally...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

where to go...
be it to her best friend's kitchen table..
or a charming Inn in the woods...
when her soul needs soothing...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

What she can and can't accomplish in a day...
a month...and a year...

Society and Technology

People have been talking about it for a while now. How our society has been losing touch with human to human communication. Our world is so consumed and obsessed with instant gratification and it is snowballing even more. Most of our lives, and I'll admit, mine as well, revolve around technology every day, all day. We go to work to design on our computers all day, Facebook our friends on breaks, Tweet when we find something humorous, check our Blackberry to find an open day to catch up with an old friend. I never wanted to believe it until now. Our world is morphing into a technological wildfire. It's sad how much we have grown to rely on our technology everyday. We waste hours and hours watching Facebook, Twitter, and other social networking sites as if we are going to miss the next big conversation or video post. People are so wrapped up in everyone else's lives now. It's an addiction we have all been submitted to. When we have something important to tell someone we text them because it's easier than telling them in person. I think it's awful that we have given in to that. In a sense our society has lost their nerve. We rely on texting or Facebook messaging someone rather than wanting to talk to them in person because it's easier. Kids who are growing up with this world of technology are growing up with this mentality and I'm afraid it's causing them to lose that personal communication. They don't know how to interact with one another. They only know how to send emoticons and "lol's" every other sentence.

The invisible woman.

Just a little look into the life of an invisible lady I suppose.

Design Statement.

“I think everything in life is art. What you do. How you dress. The way you love someone, and how you talk, your smile and your personality. What you believe in, and all your dreams. The way you drink your tea. How you decorate your home. Or party. Your grocery list. The food you make. How your writing looks, and the way you feel. Life is art.” And I think that is something not everyone thinks about. That quote in itself, inspires me to find the smallest aspects of life, and make it a creative experience. I think it is a beautiful thing how we all view the world differently. We are united in our differences. Art and design are all around us, whether it be plain to see, or hidden deeper beneath the surface. There is a meaning and rhythm and feel to everything in life, and I feel that it is my job as a designer, to translate that to those who are unable to see that at first glance. Art is a passion, and it is a strong passion I have chosen to pursue in my life. I am looking forward to making it into a professional career, and it is something that I am eager to get to do, not something I have to do. It’s what I love.

Design has become a huge part of my life. I find myself in public, critiquing small posters, or ads in display windows, more so than I ever have. Being continually involved in the creative department, it has helped me to grow as a better designer. Curiosity as well, has developed my designing capabilities. Always knowing what is in trend, what is not, and knowing when to make a bold new move. I believe it takes the right “eye” to see past what may lay straight ahead. That is something I feel is unique about myself. I am always looking for the meaning behind things; there is always more than what is on the surface.

As far as my work ethic goes, I am not okay with “just getting by.” I believe that if you are not putting forth your best efforts, then there is no use in trying. I have carried this mentality throughout my designing and in any work I do.

With the strong work ethic I have, I hope that it will begin to prepare me for the future and my professional career. I hope that what I design exudes my passion for the arts and that people will see that clearly in all my work. I plan to continue doing what I love and that what I see will be shown throughout my design in a way that will move people, and help them to also see the beauty that is beneath everything.

My journey...in a nutshell.

I don't even know how to start this latest post other than a good hearty virtual, "AH!!!!!" The past 8 months just may very be the best of my life so far. Long story short, I was raised in a Christian home, went to church most Sundays, and then it just sort of fizzled. We didn't go to church anymore, and I lost that "complete" feeling in my life. For a long time I never even realized what was missing until I found it again. I started going to church again in my later high school years and got involved in some volunteer retreats, but I never found a church I felt was right for me. I went to church and it was good at first and I loved everyone there, but after some time, I felt as if I was just going to church because I was supposed to. 8 months ago I started going to White Horse Christian Center and I feel I have found a place where it is just right for me.

I have learned more in the last 8 months at White Horse than I have at the church I attended previously for 2 years. (I'm not saying the church I went to before was bad, by any means. I simply believe that everyone has their own way of understanding and absorbing certain things.) Being at White Horse, I feel God's presence in me so much more now, because I am learning to yield my whole self to Him. I've realized that God is not found in a place of worship and praise, wherever that may be, but that He dwells within you.

I feel so blessed that He has guided me to this place, and that He has put such amazing people in my life. Everyone I've met at WHCC has helped me to grow in my relationship with God and to continually work on it. I'm still learning so much and I am so excited! I am so happy at this point in my life, to have finally found that peace in my heart and His spirit within me. It is a feeling I've tried to explain, but it honestly is something you can only feel for yourself. There are no words to even begin to describe the feeling. It's been a wild journey so far, and I'm ready for what all He has planned for me in my next steps.

There goes the fear.

I'm happy. I am so very happy with my life right now. Even with all the little negative things in it, I am happy. I'm learning to embrace the chaos and bad times. You can't change people, and no matter how hard you try-you just have to find happiness for you. You can't make someone see the beauty that surrounds us, or "the little things," that make us smile. I try so hard to find that deep appreciation in others, that I think it has left me wanting to find it in myself even more. Life is what you make of it. That one sentence, those seven little words have such potency. I'm in the process of finding out exactly what that sentence means. And I don't even know exactly how to explain it, but I'm just happy. For no real reason. Nothing in my life has changed. I am just seeing life in a new light.

I am surrounded by people who seem to be unable to see the world the way I do. I don't mean that in a self righteous, "I'm better than them," kind of way. I mean, the people I've been surrounded by for all my life, have completely forgotten how to embrace the overall good in their everyday lives. I have witnessed the happiness drain from them over the years. They have let all the negative things in their lives control them and consume them. It's like they've become so accustomed to the "everyday," that they are no longer being real with themselves. The grudges, the hate, the bad days they've had in the past. We have all had bad days, and terrible things happen in our lives at some point. Don't let it control you. Rebel against it and prove the past wrong. I suppose it's a choice we all make. We can either live with the weight of the past, or look forward to the love in tomorrow. The world can be a cruel and terrible thing, I know. But I also know that the world is so full of love and amazing things.

I am at a point in my life where I am ready to take on reality. I am ready to fail and succeed, to discover a new place and live in a terrible apartment, to meet new people and fall in love, learn to cook exotic dishes and see the world. Life is beautiful and scary but this is my one and only life, and its a great and terrible and short and endless thing, and none of us come out of it alive. So if you are happy, be fully happy. We don't have forever, so find happiness in the craziness of this life. Somewhere between the traffic jams, bad mornings, and all the student loans, there is something to smile about, even if for just a second.

"Stop putting things in boxes. You will become an educated fool if you stop listening. Don’t stop listening."- Jacob Dobson

Photoshoot for fun!

We just did these in the studio for fun. I'm still learning the studio lighting bit so I thought I would use these yay-hoos as my guinea pigs:)

More of GD202 Web Design (again)

The Beginnings of GD202

Magazine spread for Electronic design. I used my oh-so-willing model of a sister yet again. Needless to say, she was not a happy camper after the 20 minutes spent in a dress in this fall weather! :)

Audi Project GD121

09.08.07 Always Loved. Never Forgotten.

I never thought I would remember every detail of that day but I do. I remember every moment of that entire week. Jennah Sue Smith was a good friend of mine who was taken from us on September 8th, 2007 in a fatal car accident near Stockwell Road. She was a member of the tennis team and also the dance team at North Montgomery High School.

When you lose someone you care about, it seems that everyone always says, "They always had a smile on their face," but she really did. I did not once see her in a bad mood or angry with anyone. She was such a fun loving person. She was so young and had so much life ahead of her. I miss her so much even still. I know that she is with our Lord watching over us. It's hard to think that it's been 3 years since she left us. And I can't imagine that it is any easier for her parents either. I pray that all who loved her may find peace in knowing that she is with God watching over us all. God Bless you sweet girl. Know that you are missed so very much.

I want to go to a place of clarity. I want to surround myself with positive people. I want to not be criticized for everything I do. I feel like I am so entirely stuck in this place of "blah." (Meaning my parent's house.) I feel like I am always walking on eggshells. I want to go somewhere where I can just BE myself. I want to not have my thoughts be thought of as "ridiculous notions." I want to not have the feeling of always wanting to pull my hair out! What is the fun in life if you are always saying no to things or trying to be something you are not? Why always be so practical?!

CELP

My photos are officially up in the office of Phil Goode at Crawfordsville Electric Light and Power! It was such a pleasure to work with Karen and Phil to get different shots of downtown Crawfordsville lighting.

Changes.

I've been told a lot that I am so easy to get along with; that I hardly ever get mad about anything. I've never truly sat down and thought about those words until now. Yes, I agree that it is not a terrible thing to be an easy-going person, but I'm afraid that I've gotten to a point in my life where I have become the one who let's anyone walk all over me. I've never been one to cause a feud nor have I ever been the type to want to be involved in anything, of, or relating to confrontational events. I guess I've always sort of avoided them. I would much rather lay low and forget things, than to deal with them and have an opinion in fear that I may be indefensible.

After my first year of college, I've grown to learn that by not taking the lead in my own life, I will ultimately get no where. That is just what I have been trying to avoid for 19 years. I was always a follower, or caught somewhere between the two.

If you can't take the lead in your own life then who is?

Recently, I've felt myself begin to understand that by not doing so, you are only going to allow others to continue to walk over you. So this is me, declaring that I am no longer taking applications for your bull-pucky. I'm not saying I've come to a realization in my life where now I all of a sudden feel the need to be a rebellious bitch, but that I am just going to not accept the things I would before, let fly. It's time to make my own way, to stop letting others use me, to put an end to following the crowd (simply because that would be easier,) and to communicate my opinion on things, because it does matter. I feel glad to have come to this realization in my life. I guess I'm finally just growing a backbone.

I need some ink.

I have been wanting a tattoo for a little bit now. I keep looking at different ones and I keep coming back to this one for some reason. I just really like it. Only thing is..will it be something I want when I'm 40? If I did get this one I think I would put it on my shoulder. I think. I just want one!! ahh.

Champions By Design Scholarship

About a month ago, the students of Ai Indy were given the chance to enter to win a $2500 scholarship and a chance to have our artwork hung in Lucas Oil Stadium for Superbowl 2012. The theme was "Champions By Design," which was very open to interpretation. When I looked up the word "champion," this is what I got:

champion |ˈ ch ampēən|

noun

1 a person who has defeated or surpassed all rivals in a competition, esp. in sports : [as adj. ] a champion hurdler.

2 a person who fights or argues for a cause or on behalf of someone else : a champion of women's rights

"A champion of women's rights," for some reason got me thinking about individuality and got me on the track of how we are "the champions of ourselves." I'm not sure how my thought process went from women's rights to individuality, but it did. I originally wanted to do a shoot of 3 different people's eyes and capture the lighting just right so that there was just enough reflection in their eyes, and then I was thinking of putting that persons' passion in the reflection of their eyes; three passions that somehow tied together in an economical way. Based on the thought of, "Together we are the world." I thought about it for a while, and then realized that I was unsure of how to execute it in a way that would get my idea across. So I ended up doing a few head-shots of my sister and two best friends. Across their cheeks I wrote the words, "I am." This idea was based on the fact that we are the champions of ourselves. Around their shots I wrote different things like, "I am power, I am unselfishness, I am generosity, ...etc." Things that make up the individualities of that person. We all are unique, and I wanted to get that across in a way that was creative and obvious by having them pose in a way that displayed their separate personalities. I guess I interpret "Champions by Design," is that we are all unique and are made up of different "designs," if you will. I just really wanted to show the beauty of the uniqueness of a person. And so, this is what I ended up with.

First studio shoot

Thankfully, I have a sister that I sucker in to helping me out. First studio shoot, just to mess around with lighting and such. Thought it went fairly well.

Recently.

Faith

Flight #24 was a major turning point in my life. Never before did I know there was someone who loved me just the way I am. Or that no matter where I go, I am not alone. I knew about God, and I knew He gave everything for me, but I never fully understood that idea. He gave His LIFE for ME. I had heard that a million times, but never actually thought about it. I never realized that He loved me exactly how I was-no need to change. With all that I've done wrong, He still loves me. And I know this may be a little late (3 1/2 yrs. to be exact) but I've never thought about how monumental this time in my life has been until now.

Since my flight I have been working on my relationship with God and I've learned that it is not an easy thing. It takes work and it takes lots of faith. I've been through some "rough patches" in my life that made me angry with God and really put my faith to the test. I tell Him when I'm mad, when I'm happy, sad..etc. I talk to God like I talk to a friend. It shouldn't be a formal thing. He doesn't want us to have "guidelines" when talking to Him. I guess what I'm getting at is that without a relationship with God, you can believe all you want but you will never truly have that connection. It's a continual work in progress so don't lose the faith.

"I'll be by your side wherever you've fallen, in the dead of night whenever you call and please don't fight these hands that are holding you."--Tenth Avenue North

Mirror Mirror On The Wall.

Took this today (Nikon D80)